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In Nene Leakes’ new Youtube show, The Life of Nene, the Real Housewives of Atlanta star gets very real about the thoughts she has regarding her husband, Gregg’s cancer diagnosis. 

In the latest episode, Leakes admits that she doesn’t know how to pay her utility bills because Gregg acts as their “house manager.” The reality TV star said that she doesn’t even know who the utility companies are besides their cable provider.

“I know we have Direct TV because it’s been off because Gregg didn’t pay it. And the Direct TV thang came sliding across the TV and had a phone number at the bottom,” Leakes explained.

Leakes, who is currently trekking across the country for her Ladies Night Comedy Tour, began speaking directly to fellow caretakers.

“It’s a lot of things that go through your head and people don’t know that. That’s what I need. I want to show some love to all of the caretakers because what goes through your head is. I’m just saying this real. Now please don’t put this against me. I’m just saying this for real,” Leakes said.

“As a caretaker, you start, it depends on where your relationship is. You look at the person and think about now. You know people love to say that karma is a b****. And karma this and karma that. Honest to God, this is the truth. I’m giving y’all the raw raw raw. You look at the person and be like, ‘I wonder is that karma.’ Now that ain’t right, but you human, okay. Then you look at the person and say you did so many things to me, is this the payback? You hope not. I’m talking about a caretaker now. A caretaker. Maybe you getting back from that time you cheated on me. Maybe you getting it back from..You don’t never know, but as a caretaker, these are the thoughts that go through your head because the medication got them roller coaster ride. They lash out on you. It’s a lot. It’s a lot.”

This month, rumors circulated that Nene and Gregg were going to separate, but Nene shut the rumors down with an Instagram post.

Two days ago, Nene wrote on Instagram, “Oh Lawd! They say we separated now @greggleakes #fakenews I appreciate you tho Gregg for accepting and understanding that being a care taker is something I’ve never done and I have truly done the best I know how all while making tons of mistakes along the way. You never asked to get sick and We were both thrown into these new positions over nite but whew chile you have kicked cancers ass! I can’t wait for u to share with the world your exciting news in a couple of weeks.”

Glennisha Morgan is a Detroit-bred multimedia journalist and writer. She writes about intersectionality, hip-hop, pop culture, queer issues, race, feminism, and her truth. Follow her on Twitter @GlennishaMorgan

Glennisha Morgan is a Detroit-bred multimedia journalist and writer. She writes about intersectionality, hip-hop, pop culture, queer issues, race, feminism, and her truth. Follow her on Twitter @GlennishaMorgan.