No Need to Fake It, You’ve Already Made It: Dealing with Imposter Syndrome
We all have that voice telling us that we are not good enough, even if it’s about an area of our life where we excel. We might feel we are undeserving of our latest achievements even if we have worked our butts off to get our book published, launch our e-commerce business, or get promoted at work.
Everything’s going great, but we sometimes feel guilty and scared that any moment now, all these accomplishments will be taken away from us because we’re not legit, and we’ve been just winging it the whole time.
Sounds familiar? The good news is you’re not alone, and there is a name for what you’re experiencing: Imposter syndrome.
What is Imposter Syndrome?
The good news is that if you’re experiencing Imposter syndrome, that means you’ve already had some success; you’re just second-guessing yourself. And if you know there’s still room for improvement and development, well, that’s a good thing. However, if it chips at your confidence and you start to be unrealistic about your abilities, that’s worrying.
Why Do We Feel Like Frauds?
It’s crazy to think about it because we’re the ones who know how much work and effort we have exerted to be where we are now, but we still feel like frauds. There are several reasons why:
1. We are our own worst critics: If you start feeling like an imposter again and your inner voice starts spewing seeds of doubt, pause and consider that the things that we sometimes say to ourselves are things that we wouldn’t say to our friends, family or colleagues. Why is that? Shouldn’t we be our number one cheerleader?
2. We can’t let go of the past: We are only human. If we committed a mistake in the past, we have to let it go. There might be a time when we were a hot mess in the past, but despite that, we still managed to collect ourselves and continue, no matter how high our hurdles might be.
3. We consider the opinions of people who don’t matter: We value so much the expectations and reactions of others. Our elementary school classmate we lost communication with years ago suddenly posted their two cents in one of our social media posts and ruined our day. Our well-meaning but tone-deaf aunt did the same. Thinking we are only legit if we please everybody is when our Imposter Syndrome thrives.
How Do We Handle Imposter Syndrome?
Now that we know what we’re dealing with, it’s easier (hopefully) to shut down (for good) that nagging voice.
1. Recognize that you’re not alone: Imposter syndrome is common and there are a lot of successful people who deal with it, even former First Lady Michelle Obama and America’s sweetheart, Tom Hanks!
2. Celebrate your wins, no matter how small: Making a big deal of even small wins can make you get used to your achievements. Don’t downplay it when someone else recognizes you. Give yourself credit where credit is due, after all, your success is no accident.
3. Reframe your thoughts: As soon as you hear that skeptical voice, change your mindset and acknowledge that you still have a long way to go and it’s okay to learn along the way.
It might take us time to get over Imposter syndrome, but the key is to recognize it for what it is: an annoying voice in our head that we need to shush. Own up your awesomeness and remember that you are where you are supposed to be.
No need to fake it anymore, you’ve already made it.
